As I sit here on a United flight from Indy to Denver, my shoes are shined, I’m wearing my best dark suit, my shirt is pressed and I’m sporting a stylish tie. I’m doing my best to create a professional and powerful image, because, when I arrive I will be creating something very powerful – a first impression.
My mother back home in tiny Crothersville, Indiana isn’t an expert when it comes to business, but neither the march of time nor technology has made one of her parental clichés outmoded: “You never get a second chance to make a first impression.” However, if that’s the case, why do many professionals fail to understand its impact?
Dining with my wife last Valentine’s Day, the waiter approached our table in the crowded restaurant. “I’m Jason, I’ll be serving you tonight,” he stated curtly. He was sweating profusely and scowling. “I’d better get your drink order now, because I’m really slammed. If you know what you want to eat, just go ahead and tell me that now, too.” Wow. That really enhanced the romantic atmosphere I was hoping to create!
The problem for Jason and his restaurant is that no matter what happens next, the experience of the evening is soiled. We wanted to have a nice, romantic Valentine’s Day dinner, but instead our first impression is that it’s going to be a challenging night with a difficult server. Don’t get me wrong. I’m sorry that Jason is “slammed” – but what the hell did he expect on Valentine’s evening? And, does he really think his problems should be transmitted to the people in charge of the table’s post-meal tipping decision? The problem is, he didn’t stop to think about the importance and power of first impressions.
The same thing often happens in job interviews. HR executives tell me – and my personal experience supports – that prospective employees often kill their chances by focusing their communication upon what they want from the job, rather than what they can contribute to the organization with whom they are interviewing. Certainly, part of that interviewing process has to contain details about your experience and education. However, what every organization seeks from you in an interview is for you to display a passion for performance directed toward the company from which you seek employment.
Let’s face it – first impressions in business are strikingly similar to first impressions we encounter in our personal lives.
How do you create a positive first impression? Center your thinking on these three points:
1) Everything matters
2) Focus on the other
3) Be your best self
First, everything matters. The more important the impression, the greater your focus should be on everything.
Henry Ford was interviewing an executive over breakfast for a major management position with his then-rapidly growing company. When the candidate took the shaker and salted eggs he had yet to taste, the cantankerous Ford said, “This interview is over.” When asked to explain by the stunned executive, Ford replied, “If you’ll salt eggs you have yet to taste without knowing whether or not they need it, you’ll spend my money without knowing whether or not it will bring results.” Thankfully, not every interviewer is as persnickety as Ford. However, for all of us evaluating a first impression, everything – no matter how small – matters.
Second, focus on the other – the other person, the organization that is interviewing you, the blind date across the table. If you center your communication upon yourself, you run the risk of appearing vain, arrogant or insecure. If you channel your strengths to impact their needs, wants and concerns, you appear confident and the kind of person we all want as a colleague or partner.
Third, be your best self. Usually, this is the point where someone says that you should just “be yourself.” However, that’s not what makes the best first impression. “Being myself” could include the self that smokes too many cigars at Sullivan’s or gets too rowdy at Colts games. My “best self” is the one who is attuned to the challenges and needs of others, who seeks to identify solutions rather than problems and who projects strength through humility. I would suggest that is your “best self” too.
Combine these three aspects – and you’re well on your way to the compelling first impression that launches lasting impact!
Respect for the audience: What Jeanne Robertson knows that Charlie Sheen is learning
One has had hit television shows and movies, making over a million dollars an episode. His name is known throughout the nation. He sold out the Fox Theatre in Detroit and was greeted by a standing ovation.
By the time Charlie Sheen had finished his show, however, many in his audience had already left the venue, or remained to boo and jeer his performance.
At another Midwestern city, in another beautiful and classic theatre, a woman you may not have heard of walked onto the stage to a great ovation.
You may wonder, how does a woman — who acknowledges from the stage she is no youngster anymore — with little national exposure (certainly no #1 hit television show), no controversy, no TMZ or Entertainment Tonight coverage, pack the same theaters as Charlie Sheen, and find her shows “winning” instead of losing the crowd?
She respects her audience.
I’ve known Jeanne for almost three decades now, and I do not know another speaker who has worked harder at her craft. She makes Malcolm Gladwell’s 10,000 hours seem like a minor investment of time and effort. And, even as Jeanne — now in her 60′s — is enjoying the greatest success in her career, she continues to labor over her content and delivery as hard as ever.
And, unlike Charlie, she walks on stage without an elaborate video introduction, flashy graphics, or “Goddesses.” She, armed with only a microphone and her wit, takes the audience for a ride that leaves them thrilled every time.
Charlie Sheen, on the other hand, seemed to just “wing it” in front of the Detroit audience — perhaps expecting his mere presence would be enough to satisfy the crowd — and quickly learned that when customers today spend their hard-earned money, even hard-core fans expect you are going to bust it to provide them an experience.
It seems as though the “torpedo of truth” in Detroit came from the audience and not the performer.
Reviews have indicated Sheen significantly changed his show, and provided his next audience in Chicago something more worthwhile. At least he’s learning. But, why should you expect your audience to pay for your “on the job” training? (And, would you wager they would EVER pay to see him again? I wouldn’t.)
However, what he discovered the hard way this weekend is something Jeanne Robertson already knows. And, it’s something every business must realize as well.
No matter what your success has been — and regardless of the industry in which you do business — every time you hit the stage, your audience has a right to expect a compelling experience from a professional who respects them.
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